The JJs List Blog

To Date or Not to Date, That is the Question

Posted by on August 17, 2021 - 2 Comments

Tips for Messaging Once You’ve Connected: The second installment in a series about online dating

By: Adrian Drower, Ask Adrian Blogger and No Boundaries Participant

Courtesy of

Welcome to your not-so-distant future. Since just about everything is online now, online dating is all the rage. It’s a good thing you have the great profile that you put together because it’s going to be very helpful. It’s time to take to the streets (the digital dating streets, I mean) and try to make a connection. By now, I’m guessing several people “like” you, and you may have “liked” several people as well.  That’s awesome!

Are you ready for the next step?  I have a feeling you are since you kept that profile alive and updated.  Everyone knows that first impressions say a lot and this is very true for that first message you send to someone, the reverse applies as well.

Below are a few tips to consider when you are ready to send that message:

  1. Don’t over use emoticons and abbreviations; they can be flirty, but they also might show you’re lazy, so tread lightly… better safe than sorry.
  2. Write like you’re speaking directly to them by using a lot of “you” and “your” statements; it makes readers feel like you’re speaking directly to them.
  3. Re-read their profile and refer to something in it that you both have in common.
  4. Courtesy of

    Ask open-ended questions. People like to talk about themselves, so give them a reason to. Just make sure to respond to their questions also.

  5. Keep it sweet, short (just not too short) and to the point. At the same time, leave them wanting more.
  6. Use humor. Be as light as possible and avoid clichés.
  7. Avoid copying and pasting messages, it’s considered a big turn-off.
  8. Don’t forget: Read over your message and edit for spelling and grammar before you click send.

Once you click send, you no longer need to hold your breath.  Now you wait for a response, just make sure you check in every now and then.  Patience is important here just like it is in life.  From that first message, you never know what may transpire!


Ed and Ellen mcmanus says:
Aug 30, 2021

great advice adrian!

Jenny says:
Sep 01, 2021

Great blog, Adrian. Fun and informative!

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